Debauchery aboard Unmasked Fishfukery

2021 was not the year of Unmasked Fishfukerys biggest catches but we still put some world class Lakers in the boat on this slower than average late fall Lake Superior BIG fish extravaganza… Every year the big lake teaches me a few new lessons and this year was no exception as some of the past years lessons became reaffirmed such as the fact, the better the friend, the more they fish, the more they think they know about fishing, the more they will run their mouth second guessing me while completely trying to reinvent wheel on how to catch fish, to the point of pissing me off… After all they are just there to have a good time and obviously do not care if they catch BIG fish and the only reason I am there is to catch BIG fish using the tried and proven techniques that have been putting these hard to reach BIG fish in the boat 8 years in a row now… The actual window of opportunity to catch these fish is very small so I am not willing to screw around experimenting just to spare your feelings when I know what produces these Big fish… This always seems to result in someone getting their feelings hurt… News flash for all of you… None of you where asked to pay a full share for the trip so you need to shut up, listen up, and work off your share by helping put some BIG fish in the boat… When you start paying for all the gas, oil, boat expenses, marina fees, and start contributing to the maintenance and cleanliness of the boat plus pay a living wage for the captain you can run your mouth with out reprisal and avoid being asked to clean fish or cook dinner… But until then, best to just shut up and fish or stay off Fishfukery while I hunt for and catch BIG fish… This seasonal trip has nothing to do with rainbows, unicorns, or your feelings and everything to do with BIG fish… If you cant handle the fact I put BIG fish ahead of your fragile feelings then instead of showing up during prime Big fish season maybe hook up with me on the fourth of July or something and we can boat around Lake Vermilion fishing unicorns, discussing how fragile your feelings are, and singing kumbaya… Fact is, we have such a short season on these BIG fish that I do not have time to listen to you whine about how I hurt your feelings by telling you how to reel a fish in for the fourth year in a row because your a clown… If you haven’t caught on yet, you probably never will so maybe you should just pay someone to fish with you who pretends to care about how you feel… I’m obviously not your guy, and the Fishfukery definitely isn’t your boat…

So the captain on your last chartered fishing trip that you paid premium/full rates put you on a bunch small fish doing it different…? Good for him… He probably did it different because his focus was on preventing amateur dumb asses like you from fucking it up, not on catching BIG fish… I do things for a specific reason to maximize success on these seasonal BIG fish… I prefer to run down riggers a specific way, just like I control that boat a specific way when swinging the balls on a tight break, or when I am cranking in a monster fish… My reason for being out there is to catch BIG fish… I’m not their to hunt memory’s from your last charter that caught a bunch of little fish while coddling you… I really do not care what the last captain did that you paid for a few small fish… I have said over and over… If you can do better, show me… Otherwise shut up and fish or stay home…

I watch from the helm every year over and over as people struggle in slow motion to get a down rigger set while I’m steadfastly focused on maintaining boat control so we don’t hang a ball up… More times than not, I am swinging the balls dangerously close to underwater structure that could rip them right off the boat while I try factoring in the large swells and gusty winds to my equation of boat control… The big fish ”Unmasked Fishukery” catches this time of the year are almost always tight to some structure… Its not anything like open water trolling like so many always want to assume… Fishfukery’s best days are those days where boat control is easy and spot on, down rigger sets are perfect, and the balls are dangling accurately close to structure/fish for the majority of the time out… Anything less produces less… So its frustrating as hell watching friends in the back of the boat tangle shit up in slow motion reinventing the wheel while I tend to the task of keeping the boat where it belongs only to hear them refute my directions/methods while spouting off how the last charter captain they paid to take them fishing did it… News flash… I don’t give a fuck what your last captain did… I don’t give a fuck what that drunk amateur told you last night at the fire either… I completely don’t give a fuck about what color spoon some jerk off standing on the dock is yelling about as we get underway just because you sat around a camp fire listening to their drunken fish tales while you drunkenly spill the beans on Fishfukery’s hunting spots/locations… Not my style to give any fucks about any of it… My style is putting BIG fish in the boat doing what I know works… Proof is in the freezer…

I know that most charter captains use the slow descent approach to lower the balls instead of bombing them too the target depth… I also know the reason they do this isn’t because it catches more fish, its because this is easier for amateurs and idiots to grasp… However bombing almost always yields better results when hunting big fish and I am reminded of this fact with more fish time and time again… Some of the reasons this technique is superior is that when you can re set that line in under a minute giving that bait more time in the zone where it is much more likely to encounter fish… If it takes you 3-5 minutes of slow motion entanglement to reset every time a rigger trips this will equate to missed fish in more ways than one… The more time that bait is in the zone, the better… And upping the odds of strikes using this technique doesn’t end there either since hooking percentages go up when you have less whip in the line… The faster you drop that ball, the less whip you induce into the line, creating more accurate hook sets when the line releases… False releases are almost eliminated in this fashion also… When I have people in the back of the boat manning the down riggers using the slow drop entanglement method we pull a fraction of the fish that we would catch using the fast drop method… Bombing the balls will always produce more precise hook sets because of less line whip, less false releases, and will keep the bait in the zone longer, resulting in more fish in the box… year after year I sit and watch false release after another as people reinvent how to set a downrigger… The days I run it all myself I have only one or two false releases the entire day, and usually twice the fish… I repeat and reprove this theory every year… Unmasked Fishfukery always catches more when I have amateurs onboard who are willing to either listen and do it my way, or willing to just sit back and watch…

Next up… Some who come aboard Fishfukery think that when a down rigger releases that you actually need to dramatically set the hook… This isn’t a requirement and actually makes you look dumb… Pisses me off to see someone pick up a rod that isn’t even loaded after a false release caused by an improper downrigger set, only to perform a wicked hookset that almost lays them on their back because all they are setting on is slack line… I can tell you with the most certainty after seeing hundreds of these big fish caught that a hook set is not required if you are setting those riggers right by keeping the line whip at a minimum along with a heavy set/bend in the rod… If that rigger is set optimally and your actually paying attention to your rods, anticipating the strike, all that’s required is too pick up the rod keeping steady pressure on the fish while you reel it in… No giant over emphasized hook set required…

And news flash… Jerking the rod around like you’re a 3 year old little girl reeling in your first pan fish on your barbie fishing pole , allowing slack in the line, pointing the rod tip at the fish, putting rod tip down in the water, etc…, drives me nuts… Nothing more frustrating then loosing trophy fish because of poor rod handling… If you can’t not handle a rod like a pro but insist on talking shit like you actually know anything about fishing, why are you even on my boat…? You should be paying full price for the trip if you can not follow simple instructions on proper rod handling… Dumbasses like you are why I stopped guiding back in the day… Every year I get to watch someone reel like crazy for a few minutes with a drag so loose they are not even taking in line… I’m sorry but are you really so stupid you cant see your not pulling in line despite reeling like a spastic idiot…? Tighten the drag a bit you dumb ass or use your thumb that god gave you… Problem is, once a dumb ass always a dumb ass so once they tighten the drag they forget to loosen it once that BIG brute sees the boat and begins to run like hell… We all know how that turns out…

The only thing that will save you when one of these big fish decide they are going to run for it is a high rod tip… If your holding that rod tip high in the air like you should be doing, you might have time to let off some drag when that fish makes a run… If your holding the rod tip down low like a dumb ass, well we know how that’s going to turn out… So why do some of you keep holding the rod like a dumb ass year after year…? I should be getting paid to watch you fuck up something so simple instead of paying my fair share to watch you fuck it up… And you wonder why the captain is an asshole…

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